16 of the best and weirdest French Halloween costumes
Looking to add a Gallic flavour to your Halloween party? Whether you’re aiming for classic French style, or something stereotypical – even borderline offensive – there’s a costume out there for you.
Napoleon
France’s most famous Frenchman, today recognised as one of history’s greatest hat wearers and generals; a man who intimidated the British so much they pretended he was short to feel better about themselves. Costume made in Britain and available in sizes ‘Small’, ‘Tiny’ and ‘Weeny Weeny Poo Pants’.
Available to buy at halloweencostumes.com
Marie Antoinette
“Let them eat Halloween candy!” This Halloween dress up as France’s most-famous queen, either sexy-style with a short skirt and candyfloss hair, or as a headless victim of the revolution. You decide!
Available to buy at halloweencostumes.com
Musketeer
Fancy some swordplay this ‘Ween? Then what about being one of the heroes of the classic Alexandre Dumas novel, The Three Muskateers? Ladies love nothing better than a man in an eighties Cher wig and a fake beard. Good luck.
Available to buy at halloweencostumes.com
Moulin Rouge dancer
Want to to flash your undergarments this Halloween? Well yes you can-can! Outfit comes with authentic tiny hat, absinthe and syphillis.
Available to buy at halloweencostumes.com
Joan of Arc
A woman who led an army to war – and got to do it while apparently wearing yoga pants. Let’s hope they’re flame retardant.
Available to buy at halloweencostumes.com
French maid
The timeless saucy domestic worker look that works equally well for madame or monsieur.
Available to buy at halloweencostumes.com and eBay.com
Mime Artist
Is this the perfect costume? Sensible trousers? Check. National stereotype? Check. Character allows you to not talk to people at parties? CHECK! Bonus: sparkly beret! You cannot lose.
Available to buy at halloweencostumes.com
French Man
Why overthink it? Sometimes you just want to be a French man with a moustache wearing a beret and a stripey shirt. Simples.
(Also the reviews are gold: “it’s a stereotype costume, but I have some French heritage, so I owned it”, “I bought this beret for my husband and he has such a large size head that he has to go to specialty shops to purchase“, and “The moustache is a small patch of fur… I didn’t wear it.”)
Available to buy at amazon.com
Wine and Cheese
Become what you love the most in the world. Comes with large knife for the cheese-wearer to self-mutilate.
Available to buy at halloweencostumes.com
Champagne
No party is complete without champagne and no Halloween party is complete without you in this dress.
Available to buy at amazon.com
Baguette
I’m going to the party as a ME sandwich.
Available to buy at deguisementsbacanal.fr
Eiffel Tower
Wear this and you will definitely be the most beautiful architectural monument in the room (just as long as that slut the Statue of Liberty doesn’t show her face).
Available to buy at amazon.com
French Poodle
Who’s a good girl? You is. Yes you IS. I mean she doesn’t look like a dog but those Halloween cats aren’t convincing either. You’re not going to offer them some cat food then be all, “Oh my God, I’m so sorry, I thought you were a real cat.” Nope, this is a sexy dog and – for one day a year – that’s absolutely fine.
Available to buy at pinkqueen.com
The Mona Lisa
Don’t tell me she isn’t French. 1) Lives in central Paris. 2) Wears black. 3) Completely unreadable facial expression means I can’t tell if she hates me or not. SHE’S FRENCH.
Available to buy at amazon.com
Emmanuel Macron
It’s our president as imagined by the creators of Wallace and Gromit.
Available to buy at deguisetoi.fr
Marine Le Pen
Hands up if you like the politics of hate and division! For a truly terrifying Halloween, go as the far right political leader who got 34% of the vote in the Presidential elections. Don’t have nightmares.
Available to buy at deguisetoi.fr
Main pic: Fishing Guide French Maid (CC 2.0)