Hollywood has long been fascinated with Paris. Its reputation for cultural sophistication and romance makes it the ideal setting for characters to follow their dreams or fall in love, all with a background of incredible architectural beauty. Yet the depiction of Paris in these films hardly ever matches the reality of day-to-day life in a large metropolitan area, with all the attendant problems of poverty, overcrowding and dog poo. (Seriously: what is with all the dog poo, people?)

The result is that some tourists, fed the polished images of gorgeous winding streets, charming resturants and – this is hilarious – largely empty art galleries discover to their dismay that this is not the reality of life in an urban area that totals 6.5 million inhabitants. A shock that in extreme cases can lead to hospitalisation and emergency repatriation.

With this in mind, which films should first time visitors avoid to prevent extreme disillusionment? We rank some of Hollywood’s most popular offerings in order of the reality of their depiction of Paris.

1. Le Week-end (2014)

Plot: Jim Broadbent and Lynsey Duncan play a late middle-aged couple who go to Paris to rekindle their romantic life. They visit restaurants, do tourist things, bump into an old friend and attend a fancy-schmancy dinner party.

Improbable points: Very few, unless you count bumping into random friend from years ago. Some of the geography is off (they appear to be in Montmartre then go for a walk and find themselves in the 8th.

Verdict: The bickering, sore knees and mixture of disappointment and elation are spot on. Lynsey Duncan’s indecision when choosing restaurants was painfully accurate. Should be mandatory viewing on all flights to Charles de Gaulle.

Verdict: Balderdash.

2. Forget Paris (1995)

Plot: A couple, played by Debra Winger and Billy Crystal, have the story of their relationship told by their friends gathering in a restaurant. They recount how the couple’s early romance took place in Paris and how this becomes the high point of their relationships, unatainable afterwards.

Billy Crystal flies his father’s body to Paris to be buried with his Army buddies who died during WW2. The airline loses the coffin and Billy argues with the airline administration in the form of Debra Winger. So far, so realistic. They end up spending a few days together and falling in love. The rest of their married life is spent comparing this idyllic period with their mundane reality.

Improbable points: Nothing really. Plenty of walking in front of famous sight but that’s what tourists do.

Verdict: Realistic.

3. The Aristocats (1970)

Plot: Duchess, a pampered pussycat and her three kittens are catnapped from their rich Parisian owner’s house by a greedy butler who wants to secure their inheritence for himself. The cats are restored to their rightful home by Thomas O’Malley, street cat, and his jazz-playing buddies.

Improbable points: Look, people do leave their fortunes to cats. And we all know that the butler did it.

4. French Kiss (1995)

Plot: Kate (Meg Ryan) travels to Paris to win back her fiancé who has fallen in love with a beautiful French woman. She becomes mixed up with French grape smuggler (Kevin Klein), has her bags stolen and falls over adorably several times, all in the pursuit of her man.

Improbable points: Kate’s doctor fiancé is staying at the George V. This is a man who lives with his parents. Kate alone has saved up a deposit for their home downpayment but he’s staying at Paris’ swankiest hotel. Later he wears Versace shirts. Almost as unlikely, Kate keeps missing the Eiffel Tower.

Verdict: Classic Paris as seen by people who haven’t been there.

5. Ratatouille (2007)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQUpZqshj7M

Plot: Food enthusiast and professional vermin, Remy, becomes a chef in a failing restaurant, aided by human puppet Linguine.

Improbable points: Sure it’s unrealistic that a rat could get a job in a restaurant but that pales in comparison with downright lie that kitchen porter Linguine could afford the rent on his tiny but well-situated apartment.

Verdict: Basically a documentary.

6. Midnight in Paris (2011)

Plot: A Hollywood screenwriter (Owen Wilson) visits Paris with his fiancée’s family, and splits his time between being irritated by rival (Michael Sheen) and trying to write his first novel. On a midnight walk one night he finds himself  transported back to the roaring twenties where he meets Paris luminaries such as Fitzgerald, Picasso and Hemingway.

Improbable points: Possibly the bit where the market seller remembers him from his previous visit. That and “I love walking in the rain” which no one outside of fiction has ever said.

Verdict: A film made by someone in love with the idea of Paris but with no interest in the city itself.